


Childhood

by orphan_account



Category: Romeo And Juliet - All Media Types, Romeo And Juliet - Shakespeare
Genre: M/M, Sex Gone Wrong, doesnt actually get explicit i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-29
Updated: 2015-08-29
Packaged: 2018-04-17 21:09:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4681571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Benvolio discovers how important it is to trust his better judgment when Mercutio wants to explore his kinky side. Romeo just wants to go back to sleep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Childhood

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really, really sorry for this.

"I don't think this is a good idea."

Mercutio really had no clue how to hold a flashlight, Benvolio was quickly realizing; in his haste to drag his boyfriend along, the beam of light was swinging haphazardly along the ground, making it very difficult to see where they were going. Of course, Mercutio seemed undeterred, both by limited visibility and Benvolio's lack of enthusiasm.

"This," he retorted, tightening his vice grip on the other boy's arm and pulling Benvolio forward another few steps, "is the best idea, Ben. It's the greatest idea I've had all week."

"You said that yesterday, too."

"Yes, but this time I actually mean it. Come on!"

It wasn't that Benvolio didn't want to spend time with Mercutio, or even that he wasn't used to his bizarre whims; but there was some sort of sanctity to a playground, he had always thought. It was a place of refuge, of peace, of childhood- in short, not the sort of place that should be visited in the middle of the night by two teenagers with less than pure ideas in mind.

As Mercutio swung open the gate, which had been left conveniently unlocked as if for this express purpose, another rather disturbing thought occurred to Benvolio and caused him to stop in his tracks again. Wood chips crunched under his feet as the blond turned once more, looking more than a little exasperated. "You're worrying again. Stop it."

"We could get arrested for this."

"Probably. If we're caught. Which, to me, is the perfect reason _not_ to get caught." Reaching over, Mercutio twined his arms around Benvolio's neck and pulled him close- closer to the swing set. "Come on, this is _romantic_. Midnight adventures, daring risks, sex on a swing-"

Benvolio rolled his eyes. "You were doing so well until that last part."

Mercutio hushed him with a finger to his lips; flatly, Benvolio’s eyes darted between the finger and the boy, a warning quirk of his eyebrow inspiring Mercutio to somewhat sheepishly remove it.

Benvolio sighed, and, obligingly, leaned back on the swing; Mercutio’s golden eyes lit up with eagerness. Benvolio was willing to try whatever his boyfriend wanted to do, even if it was downright weird, illegal, and probably dangerous as well. The very valid question refused to escape his mind; precisely how did one have sex on a swing?

The answer; they didn’t. Benvolio quickly learned this as Mercutio tried to lower himself onto him and his spine promptly folded backwards, prompting the Montague to let out a strangled curse. Mercutio practically fell off of him as Benvolio sprung up like a wounded cat, groaning and rubbing his back with one hand.

“Let’s not try that again.”

“Agreed,” Mercutio chuckled from the ground, though he did seem a bit disappointed. “Are you okay?”

“Fine.” Benvolio winced; that definitely could have gone better. “If you have any other bright ideas, now would be the time to vocalize them.”

“Well, actually Benny…” Mercutio rose from the ground, brushing wood chips off the legs of his pants as he did so; slowly, he took Benvolio’s hand and extended it towards the large tunnel slide in the middle of the playground. “I have something even better in mind.”

Benvolio wasn’t an idiot; this entire thing just screamed _“BAD IDEA”,_ in neon colors and flashing lights. He remembered going down those slides as a child, and it was always easy to get stuck inside if you twisted into the wrong position; how could they be expected to get out of there alive?

Then again, he mused, maybe that was how Mercutio _wanted_ to go. Of all the ways you could die, having sex was a particularly memorable one, especially sex inside of a playground slide. You could say a lot of things about Mercutio, but you definitely couldn’t say he wasn’t ambitious.

He turned his head towards his boyfriend; the blond boy just seemed so excited, gazing at him with eyes that were so hopeful it was almost disgusting. Benvolio pursed his lips; in spite of his better instincts screaming warnings at him, he forcibly shook them off. After all, how bad could this be?

Mercutio was practically gleeful as the two of them crawled inside of the slide; almost before Benvolio realized it, his shirt was off, and Mercutio’s had been discarded to the side as well. Their pants quickly followed, and dressed in next to nothing both boys crawled inside of the slide, their bodies entwined with each other and flesh against bare flesh.

It was... less pleasant inside than either of them had hoped. The fit was tight, the air was stale, and their skin quickly began to stick to the plastic as things started heating up. More than once, Benvolio had to detach himself from where he was leaving a pattern of marks on Mercutio's neck to squirm, just to make sure they weren't about to be trapped inside. Each time, to his relief, he found that movement, while limited, was not impossible.

It was only after Mercutio's hands had long since wandered past Benvolio's waist that it occurred to them that they really couldn't do much in such cramped quarters. "Maybe we should get out now," Benvolio suggested, eagerly seizing upon the opportunity to perhaps be free once more. "You can show off your flexibility much more easily out in fresh air."

"Well, yeah..." Mercutio tilted his head, thoughtful. He looked disappointed at having to lose out on his fantasy; a pang of pity struck Benvolio. Weird as it may be, Mercutio had just looked so childishly eager before, and Benvolio really did feel bad to have to let his boyfriend down.

When Benvolio's conscience started nagging at him, bad things happened. It was a notorious phenomenon; his sensitivity often left the usually rational Benvolio vulnerable to terrible ideas.

This was one of these times.

"Or..." Mercutio's head lifted hopefully as the sound of his boyfriend's voice once more. Benvolio smirked. "You could show me how flexible you are _in here..."_

_That_ Mercutio would be happy to do. With a broad smile, the blond squirmed and twisted his body in the enclosed tunnel, until at last he had managed to turn himself upside down. Now his head was just where they both wanted it to be; Benvolio grinned, waiting for Mercutio to make his move.

After several seconds of waiting and only that, however, he found himself beginning to get impatient. "Is there a problem?"

"No," answered Mercutio, a bit too quickly.

"Then why are my pants still on?"

Mercutio cleared his throat; a moment of unimpressed silence passed, then he cleared it again. "Well?" Benvolio prompted, a feeling of dread slowly beginning to rise its way up in his stomach.

"You see, Ben, sometimes things happen... things you don't necessarily mean to happen, bad things, but they happen anyway and you just have to learn to deal with-"

"You're stuck, aren't you?"

"Yes," Mercutio replied promptly. "Can you move at all?"

Benvolio attempted it, testing out his luck by trying to twist his way up the tunnel; but it was no use. He and Mercutio were pressed so tightly together that it was impossible for him to move at all by this point. The both of them were completely stuck.

"No," he returned, fighting the urge to groan. "I really can't."

"Oh." Mercutio's voice was flat. For a moment, neither of them could think of what to say- what possibly could be said about a situation like this. Then: "Well, that's just great."

xXxXx

"We're going to die in here."

"To be honest, it's not 'in here' that I'm worried about."

"We're going to starve. We're going to suffocate. Oh my god, I don't want to die without pants on."

"Ben. This is a playground. We aren't going to be stuck here forever, just until the furious suburban moms manage to drag us out with their freshly manicured claws and tear us to pieces for defiling their precious innocent youth. That's who I'm really worried about."

"Oh- oh, _oh my god!_ We're going to die!"

"Why are _you_ freaking out?"

"We're going to die, Mercutio! Death! Death by the entire elementary school PTA! I've had _nightmares_ like this!"

"So have I, though in a vaguely different context- ha, I remember _those_ dreams-"

"You're not helping!"

"You're right. You know, it sure is a good thing I can reach your cellphone."

"You- wait, what?"

xXx

When Romeo Montague was roused from a particularly pleasant dream at two in the morning by the familiar chime of his cell phone, needless to say he wasn't the happiest camper. The fact that it was his cousin calling him- his cousin who by all rights should be asleep just down the hall- was enough to really set his teeth on edge, and it was evident enough as he picked up the phone.

"Hello?" he slurred, his sleep-deprived mouth not quite cooperating with him.

"Romeo. Thank god. You have to help us."

"Who is it and what do you want."

"Look, this is a really awkward situation and I'd be really happy if I didn't have to explain, but we need you to come down to the local playground now- like right now. I wish I were joking."

Baffled, Romeo struggled to make sense of his cousin's rambling on the other end of the line. Benvolio might as well have been speaking Japanese for all he could comprehend. "You want me to _wha?_ "

"Come down to the playground!" repeated Benvolio, the urgency in his tone mounting. "And, uh... not to sound weird, but you should probably bring butter or some other type of... umm..."

"Bring lube," suggested a second voice loudly, obviously farther away from the phone. "Or a chainsaw."

"Do not bring a chainsaw, Mercutio, stop confusing him!"

"You need a chainsaw?" Romeo, still groggy, repeated in bafflement.

"Yes!"

"No!"

"I'm going back to sleep." Romeo moved to hang up the phone, but two rather panicked voices on the other end stopped him. He listened as a brief scuffle ensued over the phone- _("I know how to deal with him!" "You're going to get us killed!")_ before finally someone seemed to win out and reclaim the line.

"Romeo, honey, remember that time in school when you went to make out with that girl inside of a locker, only you wound up pissing her off and she closed the door and left you in there?"

In an instant Romeo was wide awake. Mercutio continued talking, sounding unbearably smug. "Well, you know who had to come to your rescue that time. Now, we still have those pictures, so if you want to pay us back for our heroic deeds in full you'll get your tired ass down here with something that can get us both out of a slide. You'll save us from death by Helen the housewife, save yourself from a lifetime of embarrassment once those pictures are leaked to every girl in Verona and her mother, and everyone can go home happy."

Romeo was already pulling on his shirt. 

xXx

Benvolio couldn't help but feel impressed. When Mercutio played dirty, he played _dirty_ ; but it was enough that, not fifteen minutes later, the voice of Romeo could be heard down beneath the slide as he tried to figure out a way to get them out.

"How many bones do you think I'd break if I just grabbed one of your legs and pulled?"

Mercutio considered this for a moment. "Too many. Try something else."

"Like what?" Romeo's voice was incredulous, vestiges of the laughing fit he had just managed to get over- Benvolio was still smarting from the indignity- evident in his voice.

Mercutio shook his head in exasperation, smacking his fist forcefully against the wall of the tunnel. "Did you bring the lube?"

"I brought..." Romeo hesitated. "Well, there really wasn't enough butter."

Benvolio and Mercutio exchanged dread filled glances. "What did you bring?" Benvolio ventured cautiously.

In answer, Romeo simply held a bottle of olive oil up the slide.

Benvolio felt like weeping. Mercutio, on the other hand, seemed to never have found a situation funnier.

xXx

Benvolio had no clue what was more humiliating; the fact that it took half an hour to pry them out, or that the next day he still had rubber burns on his thighs.

Romeo of course refused to let them live it down; Benvolio had half a mind to remind him of exactly how many times they'd come to his rescue in a precarious romantic position, but he ultimately let his cousin's amusement slide. After all, Romeo had woken from his sleep and come to save them; humiliating though the circumstances might be, Benvolio was just happy to be out.

"So," Mercutio sighed the next day, leaning back on Benvolio's bed and resting his heels on the bedside table. "Looks like our kinky adventure didn't go as planned."

"Don't go getting any ideas." Benvolio was still injured enough from the night before, in body and pride. He shot Mercutio a venomous look, daring him to say more.

As usual, Mercutio couldn't take hints. "Oh, come on Benvolio. I have this really great idea for tonight, we can climb that huge tree in your backyard- Ben- Ben, come on, wait, this is a great idea- Ben, _where are you going?_ "

Benvolio strode out of his bedroom, allowing the door to shut behind him. He didn't look back, but he could hear Mercutio screaming all the way down the hall.


End file.
